For most of my life, I thought I hated football — and thought I knew exactly what I needed in a partner. Both turned out to be more complicated than I expected. Here's my revised list of seven non-negotiables, and the fifty-seven criteria I'm still willing to edit.

I crossed the finish line of my first triathlon at 15 — dead last, chafed, and feeling defeated — while my mom cried tears of joy. Thirty years and 90 triathlons later, I finally reached the goal I set that day. Here’s what I wish someone had told my 15-year-old self about goals that take decades to achieve.