Body Image and Self-Esteem: What I Wish I Could Tell My 13-Year-Old Self

What would you tell your 13-year-old self about your body? What do you tell young girls in your life today about body image?

In this episode, Elizabeth sits down with Blair Haseman, founder of Girls Thrive, for a deeply personal conversation about body image, self-esteem, confidence, and the messages girls begin absorbing about their bodies at a surprisingly young age.

For many of us, the answer might be less about how we looked and more about everything we wish we’d known: that our bodies don’t define us, that comparison isn’t a measure of our worth, and that we could have spent a lot less time worrying about how we looked – and a lot more time simply being kids.

Blair shares her own experience struggling with body acceptance beginning in elementary school, and how those experiences ultimately shaped the work she now does to help girls develop a healthier relationship with their bodies.

Together, Elizabeth and Blair explore the pressures girls face as they grow up, the impact of teasing and comparison, and why our focus on what women’s bodies look like can overshadow what they are actually capable of doing.

The conversation also turns inward as Elizabeth reflects on what she would tell her own 13-year-old self – including lessons about food, fitness, failure, comparison, aging, and learning to accept that our bodies aren’t supposed to look the same. At the heart of the conversation is a simple but powerful idea: your body is an instrument, not an ornament.

In this episode, Elizabeth and Blair explore:

• • Why body image struggles can begin as early as elementary school

• • How teasing, comparison, and cultural expectations shape girls’ self-esteem

• • How to shift the focus from what our bodies look like to what they can do

• • The complicated relationship between food, fitness, and body image

• • What Elizabeth and Blair would tell their younger selves

• • Learning to embrace failure, imperfection, and change

• • Why our bodies don’t have to look the same – even when we put in the same effort

• • Why women shouldn’t feel the need to hide their strengths or make themselves smaller

Maybe the real question isn’t just what we would tell our younger selves, but what we’re teaching the girls growing up around us. And perhaps it’s never too late to start giving ourselves some of the same grace, perspective, and encouragement.

About Blair Haseman:

Blair Haseman is the founder of Girls Thrive, a nonprofit organization based in Helena, Montana, focused on empowering girls through physical activity and education, with an emphasis on positive body image, self-esteem, and self-confidence. Her own experiences with body image struggles inspired her to make this work part of her life’s mission.

Episode Timestamps

• • 00:00 — What would you tell your 13-year-old self?

• • 02:07 — Elizabeth introduces Blair and the conversation around body image

• • 03:18 — Blair’s story and the mission behind Girls Thrive

• • 06:00 — Confidence, the “Girl Box,” and learning to feel worthy

• • 09:15 — When body image struggles begin: teasing, puberty, and comparison

• • 11:00 — Focusing on what your body can do instead of how it looks

• • 13:19 — Beauty, health, “pretty privilege,” and why every body looks different

• • 15:37 — Blair’s eating disorder, hospitalization, and experience as a competitive runner

• • 21:42 — Learning to stand up for yourself and walk away from harmful situations

• • 24:45 — How unhealthy eating and body image issues can show up differently for everyone

• • 27:10 — “Your body is an instrument, not an ornament”

• • 28:16 — How to talk to girls about weight, nutrition, and body image

• • 31:00 — Modeling confidence instead of simply giving advice

• • 32:43 — Helping girls think bigger about their strengths and future

• • 36:12 — The paths women are told to follow—and the dreams they leave behind

• • 42:34 — What Blair would tell her 13-year-old self

• • 44:16 — What Elizabeth would tell her younger self about failure, fitness, and self-acceptance

• • 48:26 — Girls Thrive and creating change in the local community

• • 51:10 — Strength, vulnerability, and being unafraid to cry

Show Notes:

Learn more about Girls Thrive and how to get involved.

Hear more Imperfectly Honest perspectives at www.imperfectlyhonest.com.