I’ve been asking myself this question since my friend, mentor, and investor, Brad Feld, released his book, Give First last summer. I have been blessed by the many people who have given first to me, including Brad (you can read about our story here). This support gave me the head start and self-confidence and to become an entrepreneur and achieve seemingly impossible things.
I like to give the same kind of support to others. I genuinely enjoy being generous. However, I have a tendency to over-give. Even when my body tells me that I have no more to give, I want to dig deeper, work harder, and push through to give more. That rarely goes well. It takes a toll on my health, and when I am feeling tired and uninspired, my attempt to help often feels that way, too.
I have been working to curb my tendency to over-give by learning to listen to the warning signs telling me that I need to scale back. I am writing them down to remind myself for future reference. They may also resonate with you.
- I find myself feeling as if I am spending too much time answering emails and engaging in screen time.
- I feel resentful about the number of obligations on my calendar.
- I have trouble carving out time to be in creative flow.
- It’s challenging to find the inspiration to write.
- When I talk about my week, I have trouble coming up with things I am excited to report.
- I start to feel physically sluggish and sometimes have trouble sleeping.
I know that I am most helpful to others when I am feeling rested and in sync with my priorities, and when I am spending the majority of my time working in my Zone of Genius. I used to view my attempts to honor this as selfish and self-absorbed. I have learned that I can give the best of myself by creating boundaries and constantly checking in to ask, “Am I Giving Too Much?”
How do you know when you are giving too much? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
